Things Worth Having Take Time

This Saturday, I had set aside time to take care of some tasks I had put off for a while now. One of those tasks being to update my resume and the cover letter template that I tend to use, which highlights all of my accomplishments in past roles. Since I already have a resume from the last time I applied to jobs, I didn’t think it would take me long to make some tweaks here and there. Of course, once I started to work on it, I had to remind myself that it needed to flow and refer back to the job(s) that I am planning on going for. What I initially thought would take me an hour or so, took me close to 3 hours to complete. Having the knowledge of how online Application Tracking Systems (ATS) work, I wanted to make sure I had used all the right key words so that my resume could be easily pulled. I was growing frustrated as I realized that I wouldn’t be able to do any of the other to-do items on my list. Now that I have finished updating both documents, I feel a deep sense of relief. The hard part is over and now I can start using them. One more thing I get to cross off of the December to-do list (yayy!)

I should have the same determination and patience for all of the things that I want to accomplish and attain. What’s that popular saying again, “things worth having take time”? I do agree with that statement overall. However, when you’re going through the process, frustration can build when the timeline you may have set gets stretched out more and more. When you get sidetracked, there’s this sense of failure that takes over. I have to constantly remind myself that a delay doesn’t mean failure (or denial). Before I started my weight loss journey, I had a timeline set in my head for where I would be right now. I’m not so hard on myself that I’m not exactly where I want to be, especially since I am seeing slow progress. My dietician keeps reassuring me that I’m on the right track. “Slow and steady” is the best way she says. According to her, I am more likely to keep the weight off when I lose it gradually. When I’ve done detoxes in the past, I would lose so much weight in a short period of time, but would later gain it all back and then some. As I sit here typing, I am practically swimming in my lounge pants. I’m on par to reach my weight loss goals before April for sure.

Where I’ve grown restless with time is as it pertains to finding “the one”. I took myself off the market several months ago to heal and reflect on what went wrong at my last attempt. I’m feeling a little gun shy to get back out there but I don’t want to make the same mistake of taking myself out the game for too long, like I have in the past. I finally went on the app today to look at my profile and realized it needs work. As I started to update it, I quickly logged off. I didn’t have the bandwidth to deal with it today. Despite feeling that way, I kept thinking that I need to be even more intentional with it. More thoughtful about the message I am conveying with my pictures and words. I put “under construction” in the biography section, changed my main photo to one I took this past Halloween night and logged off. My profile needs a revamp, I need to take new photos for it and I want to make sure I am in a positive headspace when I am working on it. Like a vision board, I want to attract positivity and like-minded individuals who are on a similar journey. I want it to be clear and concise in hopes that those who aren’t serious weed themselves out.

There’s been this trend I keep hearing about from other women of being love bombed and misled. Lots of broken hearts and hopes dashed. I’ve begun to disengage from those conversations so that they don’t negatively impact my thoughts and views. However, my antennas are up and I am more cautious about how I move in these streets. One common theme I keep hearing from those women is that they all rushed into relationships without fully vetting the men they were coupled up with. I’m in no rush and plan to approach this like I have all of the time in the world. There is a reason why I haven’t found my person yet. I need to learn why that is. Recruitment for cuffing season is still upon us and I’m okay with sitting on the bench for now as I brainstorm about my next “plays” in love. I have to keep reminding myself that love worth having takes time, not necessarily to find but to build. It all starts with self-love. I only want to get married once. I know we don’t have any control over that since it takes two. I’m a firm believer that if I/we (future mate) do all of the pre-work, we can avoid the “D” word. Only time and real effort from both parties will tell.